This Conversation Could TOTALLY Happen

When I miss my boyfriend I have conversations with him in my head.

Me: ”By the way, thank you for lending me that thermos. It’s been a life saver.”
Him: “No problem. By the way, where’s my shirt?”
“Here. That one was a life saver, too. I’m gonna miss it.”
“Aw. Hey, is that my sock?”
“Mmmh.”
“I recognize it.”
“Well, yes. But I’m gonna keep that.”
“Keep it? It’s my sock.”
“Yes. But I’ll have it in my drawer and it can remind me of you. When I miss you I’ll wear it. It’ll be like a hug. For my feet. Technically foot.”
“I need that sock.”
“Not as much as I do. Look, I’ll buy you new socks and then eventually I’ll steal those, too. That way I get my little reminders and you get a new wardrobe. Do you like colors?”
“I don’t understand why you need the damn sock!”
“Look, you’re already taking the shirt so just give me this one!!!”

My boyfriend’s coming over tomorrow and I’m not sure I’m letting him get away with the shirt, either …

 

TV Love is Boring

Love is the currency of fiction. We pay good money to be led into the mind of some empty mask-character whom we can inhabit and experience a new love through. It’s a great way to get around adultery, really, as your certain other will never suspect just how serious that crush on Mr. Grey, Darcy or other dashing brooding dude.

(I’m not comparing Grey and Darcy. No, NO THAT’S NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT DAMN IT!)

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Point blank, before the rambles go too far, as they invariably do: You’ve got this story and there’s a hero or heroine and about ten minutes into the story you meet this person of the other sex (or, as in “Imagine me and you” from the same one) who is obviously going to be the love interest. Continue reading

Female Adequacy Is A Thing

Inadequacy. Whether about looks or personality the feeling is common to many.
For some women it takes a step beyond that. “Being thin” becomes the answer to all problems: “why am I not popular/funny/smart?” comes down to “I’m not thin enough.”

We’re bombarded with lies every day, telling us we’re not thin enough or that we should get rid of our nonexistent wrinkles or at least prevent those coming with age – ugh, AGE! – which teaches us to look discriminately at ourselves.

After high school was over I, as many other Danes, took a sabbatical. Instead of working or traveling I focused on writing. I spent a LOT of time with myself and a handful of close friends.
My solitude forced me to deal with these issues.

I started longing to meet new people and looked for opportunities to fill my everyday life. One day, an opportunity found me.

I was doing crossfit with a woman named Maren, whom I learned did pole dancing, and my excitement could not be contained. Perhaps a bit scared she gave me her card and I dragged one of my friends to a trial class.
We got hooked immediately.

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American Love versus Danish Kærlighed

You’d misunderstand my point if I said I liked America, so to make sure everyone’s on the same page I’ve got to say I love it.

I love how open people are, the can-do-spirit, the willingness to work and succeed – it’s great.
What’s not so great is your perception of the word “love”.

One of the best monologues a teacher ever gave me was when my English teacher taught us the difference between “being in love” and “loving someone”. But I find that the usage of these words in American culture aren’t far apart and that her speech worked better with the Danish concepts. Continue reading

Guys get the Girls get to be Sluts

Lights are low, there’s a buzz in your blood and what the next person says to you is hilarious. You laugh and forget what it’s all actually about and suddenly feel like dancing.
Then you see a stranger enter the dance floor, his back straight as if to declare ‘here I am’ to everyone.
“That guy helped Dennis out,” a friend tells you, “with that exam he had to redo. Apparently they went out to celebrate after the test. He’s been with over 50 girls! Man, he’s my hero!”
You feel a prickling interest. 50 girls? How? What’s so special about this guy that he could get 50 girls to scooch out of their undies for him?

Different scenario, same description: lights low, buzz-blood, next-person-hilarity.
A woman enters the dance floor, hips swaying, hair everywhere. You’re breathless because she takes up the dancefloor – she owns that dance floor.
“Katrina brought her along, didn’t she?” one of your friends ask.
“Yeah. She’s been with like 50 guys. Kind of a slut. You can go for it, but watch out, don’t know where it’s been.”
Laugher. You peak at her, intrigued but also, in a strange, demure kind of way that you try to ignore, disgusted.

Why is there such a difference between men and women who have several partners?

I know, I know, you’re thinking “shut up, feminist, I’ve heard this before, I know where you’re going.”
But you don’t, so hear me out.

That guy who’s been with over 50 girls? Yeah. He is a champ. Good for him. That must’ve taken a lot of work – and if it didn’t, more power to ya’.
But why is a girl with the same score not as impressive?
The answer is simple: Continue reading

Western culture and its love affair with prostitutes

These days media flourish with women of different kinds.

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You can make up whatever argument you want but women definitely have a lot more representation these days. I’ve seen a lot of shows with badass women.

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Along with these many kinds of “strong women” – a term flung around so much these days it’s virtually a buzz word – there’s a new uprising for femininity. Continue reading

Pole Progression! Superman

It’s been a long time underway but I finally managed to do a nice Superman – and not take FOREVER to get from angel into it!

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WUPTI! LET’S GO SAVE THE WORLD!

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Ahem, as soon as I get off this thing …

Of course it’ll take a long time before I reach THIS level, if EVER:

I promise to put up more pole related stuff but also to get crackin’ with the chemistry (okay, I promise not to crack anything since the contents will probably be poisonous).

2014: A Year of Firsts

Though I turned 20 in 2014 it was a year that brought on a lot of new things for me. It was the first time I solo traveled.

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I learned to trust my own judgment more and to think critically about the consequences of who I meet and hang out with – and whose couches to sleep on.

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I learned that getting lost can be scary, but good. I learned that sprinting is quite easy when there’s a bus about to leave.

I learned that people can walk in and out of your life and leave an impact without necessarily having to stay there.

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In 2014 I got my first book published. The Time Prisoner has not exploded the market (yet) but it has taught me much and branding it is something I thoroughly look forward to.

The Time Prisoner taught me so much about hard work and editing that I was ready to give the project up for good – accepting everything I’d learned as part of a larger process – when a publisher declared they wanted it.

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It’s also the year of my first boyfriend, which has put me on a rollercoaster of emotions. Things I used to be okay with are suddenly embarrassing and things I never noticed before can make me proud.

This year I started pole gymnastics/dancing/fitness, whatever you want to call it. Despite all of the above pole could be the biggest change in my life.
The trickyness of getting these moves right shows me that I can achieve what I set my heart to – even if it hurts and my thighs beg me not to do a scorpion.

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I’ve never been good at coordination or dancing but so far I’m enjoying everything pole fitness has taught me, particularly to have more faith in my body.

I’m looking forward to 2015 and to claiming the moves, writing the books and discovering the places it has in store for me.

How Much Can We Expect Of Ourselves?

You know how they say the sign of a good chemist is an exploded lab? No? Makes sense, since they don’t say that. Honestly, the only way that would indicate a good chemist is if curiosity implied “good”, and as DeeDee has taught us, as a single factor it doesn’t help much.

A good chemist is sort of like a good chef – they keep their lab clean, know what’s boiling and got their theoretical shit together.

That last part and me? Not so much.

After a series of experiments in the lab, during which we’ve tested compounds to see which elements were in them, we reached the final test:
We’ve been given four clean compounds and no guide as to what to do with them.
Boy, do I wish I’d had more time to wrap my head around this one.

The particularities of what went wrong are not that interesting to a non-chemist. Merely know that I must have appeared lost like a pup in the rain as I let myself be confused by a table overlooking the colors of compounds and dissolution in water and acid– something that would not have happened if I’d been more confident in my own knowledge and remembered that iodate is yellow in acids.

For a moment there it got me down.
Here’s why it shouldn’t, and here’s why you shouldn’t feel down when you’ve got a hard time in your own classes. Continue reading