Carcrash Crushes With Its Mundanity

Considering the personal nature of the blog, and the nature of the somewhat less-important-in-the-larger-scale-of-things topics I usually discuss (which, obviously, I find perilously important for life), it makes sense to write about the recent carcrash I experienced.
Which angle should I take on? The adrenaline kicking my perception of life into another frame? The fright of setting a foot outside my door and the general pile of arguments against ever doing so? The relieved, almost religious, realization that everything is all right?

It matters little. The whole affair passes quickly and the most interesting thing about it was that right after hearing the crash, and being pushed forward and then pulled back by the seatbelt, my first thought was: “Now dad has another thing to worry about. How should I break this to him?”
My next thought was whether anything had happened to my back and if I’d be able to compete in the pole championship next week.
Such trivial thoughts, but they put life and the accident in a neat frame, the frame called “narrow, personal perspective”. It’s what a writer calls Point Of View. And so we can give it different names and argue about the meaning of a perfectly meaningless incident.

To quote Austen: “The whole thing will pass – no doubt faster than it should.”

(By the way, nobody was hurt)

An open letter to the Princess trapped by a Dragon – by Prince Charming

The letter you wrote me was sweet as cherry, and so was the mark of your lips, which particularly startled my heart. I’ll cherish it, always.
I hope one day to see your real lips, but that day will not be after I slay the dragon that has imprisoned you – because I will do no such thing.
Here’s an idea: slay the dragon yourself. There’s probably a bunch of swords laying around. Perhaps the dragon uses them as toothsticks. Use one of those. Continue reading

Non-Extraordinary and Going Strong

My friend, O: My parents help me too much. Sometimes my sister and I have to be like “stop it, dad, let us take care of ourselves.” We have to grow up, you know?
Me: I get it.
O: And then I just think … wow, I’m lucky to have such parents. They’ll catch me if I fall.
Me: yeah, we’re very lucky. Do you ever think about that? We’re upper middleclass without traumas, non-divorced parents – irony underscored by the fact that I’m saying non-divorced and not still-together parents – white women
O: in the best time to be a woman!
Me: Exactly! We’re white, straight women from upper middleclass and ee have all this technology, all these possibilities. Our part of the world isn’t involved in any crazy wars, we’re both getting educations we really like and we’ll probably live pretty solid lives throughout.
O: Yup. We’re so ordinary.
Me: *Laughter* I know a few people who would disagree.
O: *Frown* Yes. And they’d be correct. In fact, we’re not ordinary at all. As I said, we’re lucky. Privileged is the word.
Short silence.
Me: You’d think I’d be bored at this prospect, but to be honest I’m just sort of looking forward to it.

If Everyone Switched Sex

What would it be like if everyone changed sex at the age of 20?
If the human body naturally matured into the opposite sex what kind of repercussions would it have on our world?
Girls taught to be timid would suddenly face the pressure of being a go-getter. Girls who were called bitchy or bossy would seize their new opportunities with gusto.
Boys taught to never cry or show emotion would be put in a sensitive position. Would they struggle with being the less dominant role? Would they search out the bossy-wife-stereotype? Mother knows best?
How about boys who loved sports but are now held back from doing their best? Continue reading

Transformations – Short Story

We saved our little world and of course that was great. People who would have been cold in their grave, or too torn apart for just one grave, went about their lives, complaining over late hours, incompetent staff and cold dinners.
We did a lot of good, the seven of us, but it felt wrong. Every day was a rosebush in my heart, each victim saved a beautiful flower and each word from my comrades a thorn. Inside my heart.
Thud, thud.
Pierce, pierce.
The worst kind of thing was like when a hishi spirit came towards me and I knew that now, now was when I’d die. Continue reading

Disapointed in Sansa Stark’s Development? You’ll Love Malta Vestrit

As fourth season of Game of Thrones ended and we caught up on several of the books’ storylines in we felt anticipation turn to dread. What would happen to our beloved characters now that George R. R. Martin was no longer the dictator?
Season 5 has not impressed me. They’re treading waters while they wait. Instead, they should just jump off the cliff and take the consequences. They’ll fly or fall but either way will be better than this slow crawl to the bottom.

It’s horrible to watch characters you love be disrespected by the writers. One character I hated because of her passivity and naïve girlishness and ended up loving because of the same. Because she could be strong despite being a girlish girl, and not a tomb-boy like her sister.
I’m talking of Sansa Stark, of course. Continue reading

A Conversation With My Grandparents

”People in Scandinavia have a better tolerance for cow milk than other places because we were more dependent on it,” I said. “If you couldn’t eat it you died.”
“Yeah, or maybe you died from old age,” my grandfather laughed.
“No, what I mean is, you wouldn’t get to old age.”
“And, anyway,” my grandmother said, “in other lands, like Germany and France, they have that disgusting milk that stands outside the fridge. Long-time milk. That can’t be healthy.”
“That’s not the point,” I tried feebly. “In the past they didn’t have that. And actually, the further south you get the more normal it was to drink goat milk than cow’s milk.”
“Hmm,” she said.
“So the farther you get from Scandinavia the more likely it is to be allergic to cow’s milk.”
“Gitta and Frank drink a lot of milk, too,” my grandmother said.
I sighed, giving up.

Addressing My Desire To Be A Gamer Girl

“I always figured being someone’s girlfriend would be easy,” I told my boyfriend. “I like gaming and so my boyfriend would get to play a lot and I wouldn’t complain and he could even teach me a game or two. I knew I’d be a great girlfriend like that. That magic unicorn all guys are looking for – the girl who wants to join the game.” I sighed. “And then I have to go and find you. The one man who doesn’t play games.”
My boyfriend looked befuddled before he recomposed himself and said: “I always figured it would be easy to find a great girlfriend. Most girls don’t game, so I wouldn’t need to worry about finding a gamer girl. And then I have to go and find you.” Continue reading

Tranquilized

Once, she did not sleep.
Each hour was a task, a map to be laid out, every corner and stone turned.
There was never enough and still she seemed to have most time of us all.
One morning we found her sick and left her to do her own healing.
When she was well she told me she’d “never known sleep was so great”. She’d discovered its merit.
Now she was well I’d see her leaning on the counter with a distant look. She dreamt of sleep. She imagined not knowing what she knew and what a blessing it might be. She slept six, eight, ten hours.
It was wondrous.
There were no dreams and that was the best part. A short time of non existence, of oblivion. A small time of death.
She slept ten, eleven, twelve hours.
We told her she was getting lazy. She answered “merely inspired.”
Now she sleeps twenty hours.
Tomorrow I think we’ll realize we have not seen her for twenty four and we’ll wait for the day she wakes up to tell us how delightful her nap was before going back to drown in the covers.
And I envy her.

Decisions: Pole Championship Song?

It’s happening. Finally.
The dance studio I attend are having their first pole championship and I’m in the beginner category. I have 6 months to prepare my routine and I’m so freaking excited. During the past three months I could barely hear a song without imagining what it might be like dancing to it.
And now it’s time to pick a song.

Here’s the candidates I’m considering so far:
Totally EPIC music. But can I pull it off? Do I have the moves (and the STAMINA) to do this?
I think Shake It Out would be the easiest. Good beat, nice lyrics, a music video for inspiration and a theme. (Shaking the devil out.) I’d also love to do Florence the honor of using her song.

Hard beat but I positively adore this song. Piper and Alex 😉
This, as well, would be epic (and cut down).

What do you guys think? Know that I have 6 months to practice and I enhance fast when I have specific tricks to focus on. Ideas for combos from the pole lady audience would also be neat!